Home > Boston...again. > Expectations. Put more clothes on. Old people.

Expectations. Put more clothes on. Old people.

Another post. What is up?

So I’m laying in bed, and big surprise, I can’t sleep. I have so many thoughts pounding around up there it’s unreal. I’m thinking about my day. I’ve got stupid pop lyrics from the album I should not have downloaded stuck in there. I’m thinking about my book and how, if I could just work up the energy to turn on the light and keep my eyes open, I’d read and finish it. I’m thinking that my room in uncomfortably warm, which is ironic considering the blizzard that’s currently blowing around outside my bedroom window.

But here’s the most intriguing thought. I keep thinking about all my friends getting married. Seriously. I would guess that out of all the couples I know at least half of them are engaged or already married. Which is great for them, but let’s be honest: it’s a little freaky for us single people out there.

These thoughts reminded me of a blog post I wrote a long time ago. It was short, and I ended up changing it to private to make sure I wouldn’t offend anyone. It basically was a rant about why all my friends felt compelled to get engaged. And now, a year later, even more of my friends (or just random acquaintances) are engaged. Yet I understand it now.

I feel like life is a series of progressions. You’re born, you go to kindergarten, elementary school, junior high, high school, college, get a job, get married, have kids, have grandkids. You die. That’s a cheerful outlook, no?

I feel like we sometimes get roped into these roles or expectations. You HAVE to go to college. You HAVE to get married and have kids, so mom and dad can dote on some grandkids. My parents have always told me not to worry about getting married, but even if they aren’t telling me that, I feel like society is. Come on. Admit it. What do we all think when we see older women dining out alone, with no wedding ring on her finger? 

Got you.  

I have to wonder how many people I know are getting married because they feel like it’s the next logical step. Do people ever just want to bite the bullet and take off?

I don’t want anyone to think I’m not happy for them. I guess I’m just putting it out there that there are a lot of expectations out there for people. I’m glad I took a chance and didn’t find the sensible job. I’m glad I did something crazy and left the town, left the state, left the familiar part of the country. It’s rewarding now and I know it ultimately will be rewarding in the end.

Yet when I write this, deep down something in me shivers with fear. Despite my opinions on the subject and the relief that was I did was right for ME, I’m scaredof what will happen to me someday.

I’ll leave it at that.

On to my next subject: girls who wear a long-sleeve shirt, leggings and converse sneakers in 20 degree weather and blowing wind and snow. Newsflash? You don’t look cute. Bundle up. People are not commenting on your outfit; they’re commenting on your lack of one. GET A COAT. It’s snowing.

My next question: What do old people listen to on their iPods?

I always see people who have music buds in their ears. Although I am making a generalization normally it’s people who are a bit younger who listen to music while walking or riding the T. Yesterday, however, I was in a Starbucks and saw an old woman (I call her old becase her hair was visibly gray) who had headphones on and was bobbing her head to a beat only she could hear. It made me smile because I’ve never seen that before. It made me glad that old people can get down and “get jiggy with it.” (I figure if I’m going to bash on old people I should use one or two of their terms. Don’t judge.)

Anyway. The sighting made me wonder what she was listening to. I wish I had asked, as it would have been extremely interesting to find out.

Any guesses?

  1. February 11, 2010 at 8:01 am

    Sweet friend,

    First of all, please do not fear of offending ANYONE – this is YOUR blog, it’s where YOUR words are read. I do, however, appreciate the graceful point of view from which you write this, as others you and I know, have written on this topic in a harsh and finger pointing way.

    Second of all, I AM SO JEALOUS! 🙂 My roommate might be moving to Australia and you got to move to one of my favorite cities in the world! You are so blessed that you have this opportunity. God has not forgotten you. He has GREAT plans for you. Paul, in the Bible, knows well about living the single life (for either a time in your life or your life). Let this time be your ministry. Take advantage of it. Sometimes I wish I had your life instead of mine, just as I’m sure you wish you had the life of others instead of yours.

    Be lifted up to Him. Serve Him. Love Him. Live for Him. Then, your heart will be full.

    Love you!!

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