Home > Thoughts > Ringing in the New Year.

Ringing in the New Year.

What a Christmas break.

Tulsa, Lubbock, Midland, Winnsboro, Dallas, and back to Midland. I’m finally back in Lubbock, and I’m trying not to let that overwhelm me.

Since classes start the day after tomorrow, this is going to be my New Year’s post.

This is my last year of school, and this is going to be THE year. This will be the semester I make a 4.0. I will study and write great papers and not procrastinate. (Possibly. You know how that goes. At least I have good intentions.) I will stay organized and not let silly, ridiculous things stress me out. I’ll appreciate my wonderful professors. I’ll realize that all of this school stuff will only benefit me in my future, and I’ll have a good attitude about projects. That definitely helped last semester.

In areas other than school, I will take the time to better understand other people. I will observe more and judge less. I will realize it’s not all about me, and I will make more of an effort to help others. I will appreciate my wonderful, amazing family for who they are and try better to fit in. I will try to get along with them better. I won’t have such a short temper. I will listen more, and talk about myself less. I will love everyone for who they are, no matter what they do. I will make an effort to get out of my comfort zone, and make more friends. I won’t ever take anyone or anything for granted.

I WILL be in New York City by next year. Maybe New Year’s Eve?

 

Things have changed so much since last year. It’s truly amazing the way God has worked in my life, and all for the better. I went to the New York, my city. No one really understands why I want to go there so badly. It’s because that was one thing in my life that I could always count on; the one thing that I decided to do and got me through days when I just wanted to quit life. When I hated school and felt like everything was about to fall apart, my dream of New York was there to sustain me. It’s something I need to do to prove my independence. And, it’s where the majority of the publishing houses are.

I spent a summer away from home and thrived. I maneuvered my way through Dallas. I made new friends and worked two jobs. I fell in love with one job, and found my passion, my niche in life. I lived with and loved another family, and was treated as though I was a daughter of theirs. That is a truly incredible feeling. I still miss them. Every single day. I renewed a friendship.

I came back to Lubbock. I never knew it was possible to feel claustrophib in the wide open West Texas plains. But it is. For a while, I thought I would die being here instead of Dallas. Things are better now; so much better. I took a class I was absolutely terrified to take, and fell in love with it. I interviewed people and enjoyed it. I never thought I’d be able to say that.

I said goodbye to someone that was a part of my life  for a good four and a half years; someone that always made me feel like I had to be more than what I am. I won’t fall back into that again.

Then I met someone who made me believe again; believe that I could feel strongly for someone. I used to worry I couldn’t. I’ve never felt so completely accepted for who I am; that I could so fully be myself.

It was definitely an interesting, hard, bad, good year. I’ve been happy, sad and everything in between. I can’t wait to see what this year holds.

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