Home > new york, Thoughts > Driven.


I found out today that I’m definitely going to graduate in December (according to my advisor.) So if for some reason I don’t, blame her. And while that excites me immensely, it also terrifies me. Now, I have to start really thinking about another summer internship. And more importantly, now I have to start thinking about a job, an actual, real-life job. My goodness. I could be in New York in a little over a year.

And that leads me to my biggest fear. What if, after I’ve told everyone I want to go to New York, I can’t get a job there? How humiliating would that be? I can’t even bear to consider it. But I’m beginning to think I should. With how expensive everything is, and how much things are changing up there, I’m getting scared that it’s a definite possibility.

I’m going to do everything I can to make up there. I know I’ll live in a hole. I’m fully expecting to have to get a second job for the weekends. I know it’s going to be scary and lonely, especially considering I know exactly one person currently living in the city. That’s daunting. (Luckily, I do have distant relatives in Pennsylvania, so that’s a bit of a consolation if I ever need a break.) I think I also need to grow a tougher skin. Ha.

New York is what drives me. My room is filled with pictures from my trip; my calendar is all New York; the desktop on my computer is the Brooklyn Bridge. I have to keep reminders surrounding me so that I remember I’ll be out of this place soon. I can’t wait to be back. I can’t wait to navigate the crowded, bustling sidewalks, listen to the constant noise of traffic, see the sights. I can’t wait to learn my way around the city and finally understand the subway map. Haha. Hopefully I won’t end up in Queens again the next time I take it. (When my mom and I went in March, we got on the wrong train. And ended up in Queens. Where, while I was doubled up with laughter, my mom was in tears. Obviously, I thought it was kind of funny. But Mom was panicked. It was quite amusing, and I soothed her with, “Mom, don’t worry! Doug and Carrie live here!” Watch King of Queens.) I’m also pretty excited about visiting that 4 story Barnes & Noble again!


On a completely different note, I have a new job. 🙂 I’m finished with retail, until I absolutely have to again. Yesterday, I got hired at the La Ventana, the yearbook at Tech. I’m pretty excited. I’ve really enjoyed News Writing, regardless of the ridiculous workload, and I like the structured way it requires you to write. I’ve been doing pretty well, and this job will definitely test and hone my abilities as a writer. It’s also pretty cool that if I make it, my stories that I write will be forever in the yearbook. I’ll have a byline!! Awesome.

I suppose that’s all for now.

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